Nineteen Weeks Pregnant – A Disappointing Ultrasound

When I turned nineteen weeks pregnant, I was ecstatic.  I was only days away from my anatomy ultrasound.   I was eager, impatient, and looking forward to seeing my baby.  And kind of annoyed that I’d had to wait until nineteen weeks pregnant to do it.  With Norton, I had a doctor who had an ultrasound machine in his office and he did a scan at every appointment.  By this point, we already had enough pictures of Norton to start his own photo album.  And we already knew that he would be a boy.

So,  yeah, I was just beyond excited for this ultrasound at nineteen weeks pregnant.  We would finally find out what we were having, and then I’d finally be able to go through Norton’s old things to determine what we would re-sell and what we would keep for the new baby.  I would be able to wash and carefully fold or hang up clothes for new kid.  And, above all else, I’d finally be able to bond with my baby as a son or a daughter.  You know, instead of calling him/her “new kid.”

Physically, I was all right at nineteen weeks pregnant.  I was still struggling somewhat with depression during pregnancy, but I was doing better in terms of getting down on the floor and playing with Norton.  And new kid was still just plumping up and growing away.  Fetal movement was rare, but there.  Once, fetal movement was vigorous enough where the husband got to feel it.  It was a lot later when he finally felt Norton, even though I’d been feeling Norton move for nearly two months by this point.

So, the ultrasound.

As soon as we went back down the hall, I was uneasy.  I’d had this ultrasound tech before, and… well, let’s just put it this way.  I think she’d been doing ultrasounds since the technology was first created, and she forgot that this was a really special thing for expectant parents.  In fact, I think she forgot that there’s actually a human being attached to the uterus she’s scanning.

It was purely clinical.  She’d speak, but her first words were to complain that my bladder wasn’t full enough and “the babe” (which sets my nerves on edge, anyway… it’s not a babe, it’s a baby) wasn’t cooperating.  All in all, we left feeling cheated.  Not only did we not find out gender, new kid was lying transverse and face down, so she couldn’t get scans of the internal organs that she needed.  She acted like it was somehow my fault that new kid was uncooperative.  Secretly (or not so secretly now), I kind of felt that new kid was being uncooperative because she was kind of a douche.  I knew that I could expect to be re-booked for another anatomy scan so that they could get the heart next time.  I just hoped that she wouldn’t be the one doing the scan.

And as for the husband, instead of this being a bonding experience that made our baby more real to him, it was a clinical procedure with zero emotional impact that he could have skipped.  When we left, we made a decision: we were going to definitely book a trip to Vancouver for a 3D ultrasound.  I wanted a good ultrasound experience that would help him, darn it.  Not some miserable old bat who was determined to ruin the experience for the rest of us.

Yeah.  I’m 22 weeks pregnant now, and I’m still ticked about the ultrasound tech’s attitude.  Grr.

About Suzi

Suzi is an American ex-pat living in British Columbia. She's a cloth diaper addict, wife, mom of three, and President of the Prince George chapter of Cloth for a Cause.

Comments

  1. Oh, that’s awful 🙁 Those ultrasounds are definitely an important part of the bonding process. Better luck at your next appointment (maybe you could ask who would be doing the ultrasound to ensure you don’t get her again).

  2. I completely understand your feelings. I was 8 MONTHS pregnant before we finally knew what we were having. At my 3 month appt. the ultrasound tech told me they weren’t allowed to tell parents what we were having because of legal stuff… getting sued by parents if they said the wrong gender. So, 8 months I found out we were having a little boy. My baby is 12 yrs old and I can still remember the anger towards the 3 month ultrasound tech.

  3. When I was pregnant with Ashley, I had a horrible experience with an ultrasound tech. I had to lie on this cold metal table, naked from the waist down and was forced to look at the ceiling. She kept the monitor turned toward her so that I couldn’t see it. There I was, 19, scared to death, and this horrible woman pushing on my stomach with the force of Hercules. I left in tears, not knowing anything about my baby – whether he/she was healthy, growing, or a boy or a girl. It was awful.

    I’m glad that you are going to Vancouver for a 3D ultrasound. Sounds like you all definitely need it!

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